Loving My Bipolar Life     

     Hello out there and welcome to Loving My Bipolar Life! What an interesting name for a blog, LOVING My Bipolar Life. Those are words I had no idea I would ever say. I've had this blog as "The Crazy One" for quite some time. If only I had actually known over 10 years ago just how literal the name is. You see for me, I found out at the age of 43, nearly 44, that I am not only Bipolar 2, I have ADD and PTSD. Lucky me! Am I the first person to be diagnosed with these? No. Am I the last? No. What makes me so special then you must be asking. To be honest, nothing makes me special. I really just have hopes of sharing my experience with others so that they know that they are not alone. You see, our society has come to a place of caring so little about human life, mindfulness is few and far between. I want to create a place where people are talking about mental health, suicide, depression. I want people to not feel like they have to hide their mental illness, it is nothing to be shameful of. So I present to you my story. How I became diagnosed, what my road to self discovery is like, what my past was like and how I could and should have diagnosed much earlier in life.

     My story doesn't just begin a few months ago when I was checked into a mental health facility. My story includes my entire life as far back as I can remember. The road to self acceptance, discovery, and recovery begins in February 2018. You see, on a night that should have been full of fun and laughs, it was anything but. My husband and I had gotten free tickets to go see Arsenio Hall. While I thought the act was funny, my husband disagreed. This led me into a spiral of questioning my entire life, my relationship with my husband, my place in the world, and ultimately an attempted suicide on my part. I am sure you're thinking, all of that because you and your husband did not agree on a comedian? No, that isn't it, that was just the catalyst, the ultimate straw that broke the camel's back so to speak. I've been under such intense pressure of being a second year teacher, being a full time student, having increased health problems that caused me to live with chronic pain, having little to no support system as we had recently moved to another city & state, and having a husband who is on the road 2-4 weeks at a time because he is a truck driver (leaving me with little support).\

     I know I am not the only one going through these things and I won't be the last. I am not about the "poor me" attitude or trying to be a victim. Again, this is just my story to tell. My experience, my way of trying to open up the conversation around mental health.